its 2 am..and i am nowhere near sleeping

hrmm
oh okay.
its the time of the months.
since im expecting my period in like 2 days time
mule la sgale hormone didalam badan tidak stabil
tadi kat tempat keje ade sorang kakak nih offer mengajar kat skolah malaysia.
haha
jadik cikgu bm uuu...miahahaha
ranaplaa budak2 nih
tapi still in consideration.

what say u guys?
besok we are having this sort of jalan2 plan
tapi tak sure lagi cemane.
yesterday the ex was calling me
like non stop
and i was sleeping.and i tell him to bugger off
and he kept pleading me to hear him out
so i did
(sbb malas dgr my phone memekak in the middle of the nite)
he told me what happened in hislife
as if i care for that matter.whatever la.
but then in between perli2 session and mamai(and not to mentioned being EXTREMELY cold)
we end up laughing!
can u imagine that?
haha..damn it la.he ALWAYS knows how to twist the situation.
tapi ntahla.i think the hurt,the anger and the dissapointment are mounting up high in myself
i just cant find myself forgiving him.
and to say that im not in love with him anymore,its just imposible.
because he's been part of my life for an effing 7 years.
but somehow,in the end i said something hurtful
i know he deserves it,but i stil felt i shuldnt said those things
i dont know,it just slip out of my mouth.
haha
my friend says im being too nice
and tabah sgt melayan karenah lelaki baru mahu matured nih
tapi what to do
he's the one that takes my breath.
tak kire la how bad he treats me.
kalau die bace nih mesti bangge
hahahahahahaha..padehal aku sket punye mengaku takde prasaan dah nih
siap ckp moved on la pejadah sume
hadoih..
zatil2
so..im off to bed la..
with things still to be pondered upon.
til then


ikhlas dari saya,
cikgu zatil
or zatil

whichone better ah?ahahahaha